Best Lesson of my 20s

Two weeks ago I turned 30. In the months leading up to my birthday I felt overwhelmed thinking I hadn't accomplished some of my goals. I didn't look the way I hoped. I didn't have all my ducks in a row. I just wasn't where I hoped to be. Then I realized it didn't really matter. (I shared my realization reasonings here.)
 I am grateful for my 20's. I learned so much! I became a mother and a wife. I made amazing friends and memories. I feel very blessed for those years.

I feel like my 20s were all about learning. Learning how to be an adult. Learning how to handle my finances. Learning how to cook a full meal. Learning all these things that I easily learned and stuck in my brain by repetition. Aside from those things I learned how to be a mom, but that is something you continue learning daily. I learned how to be a wife, also something I work at daily.

With all these things I learned and all this schooling of life, the hardest thing to stick was probably the most important. I know it gets mentioned in passing. People may have advised me to do it, but I never really did. I felt inclined to at times and held back. I even gave myself a hard time for the times I did do it.

Say and do what you feel! I can't stress it enough. Who better to learn from than Dr. Seuss, right?!

I can't tell you how many times I felt like I should say something about a situation or any old general occurrence, yet I held back. I may have felt inadequate or felt the timing was off, but I later would regret not speaking up. At times I felt I should have defended myself or my opinion, yet I let the situation play out later feeling bottled with emotion. 

When life happens sometimes we hide all those feelings, words, actions we wish we would have taken and just bottle them up leaving a dangerous overflow. We may take out the resentment of that overflow on loved ones, friends, anything and anyone at our grasp when  we can't take it anymore.
We then damage ourselves and others when we explode and leave a mess of work to clean up.

You are important. Your opinion matters. Don't let others control your life and your decisions. Live how you please, just remember if you fail at something you are the only one to blame for your actions. I'm not saying go live recklessly, but I do think that one learns by every situation of their life.

Don't tip toe around people because you think they won't accept you. Be who you are. Love yourself! Who you are makes you YOU! If someone can't accept you for who you are and your thought process then walk away. You should be able to be yourself around anyone. Be confident! Speak boldly. 

I encourage my children everyday to discover who they are and say what they feel, because I do care. I care about their sanity and I care about who they become. People that have emotional problems or self confident issues tend to blame their parents, you ever notice that? I care about the relationship we have in the future. I want them to look back and know mom supported all their hopes and dreams, but also helped them to develop character and self worth. CONFIDENCE!

If you are a parent, be that example of boldness for your children. Speak up when something is wrong and make sure to explain it to them. Communication is key! Tell those you love that you love them and demonstrate it with your actions. Walk away from toxic people. Share who you really are with the world. Little eyes are watching. You're raising the future and they need to know it's okay to be themselves and it's okay to express what they feel.


  1. Dominique, you look beautiful! Your confidence and joy shine through in each photo you share. I think you're onto something with the lesson you learned, it's always beneficial to speak your mind (one way or another!). Also, Happy Very Belated Birthday! Can't believe I missed it.

    1. Thank you so much Sarabeth! Your comments always boost my spirits.

  2. Love these sentiments. It took me a long time to learn to say as you feel because you likely have way more to gain than to lose!

  3. Oh man, I'm only 26 and I'm already learning so many of these things! Thanks for sharing these great lessons!

    xo, Chelsie @ Hey There, Chelsie

  4. This is such an important message that I don't think I could hear enough. I've fumbled along at times and sometimes I still find myself doubting certain decisions but this quote says it all. It's also true that these values we try to instill in our children, need to be values we practice ourselves...such good points.


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